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Ways to Save a Marriage
If you're concerned with the health of your marriage, it's a good thing you're taking care of it now, before it gets worse. There are some things you can do to keep your marriage from going under.
- Take a good look at yourself. When a marriage is faltering, it’s easy for each spouse to blame the other one for all the problems. But what are you doing to make things better? Do you have something to talk about besides the kids? Have you kept up with the interests that you used to have in common? Do you take care of your body and try to look good for your spouse? Have you forgotten that at the end of every day, you will meet your lover again?
- Do something nice. Maybe your spouse doesn’t do the things he or she used to do for you, like bringing flowers or cooking a favorite meal. That kind of neglect can sting, and wear down your marriage. But you haven’t been doing it either, have you? Instead of waiting for your spouse to do it first, and then wallowing in your self-pity when they don’t, you do it. Make the gesture toward your spouse you wish he or she would do for you.
- Make time. Look at your weekly schedule. How much of your time is devoted to your spouse? This doesn’t include, "I work all day," or "I do the laundry," which, of course, your spouse benefits from. This means time spent listening to your spouse or doing something with them. It seems like a lot to ask with your busy schedules, but you used to do it, back when you were dating. You can do it again.