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Stop Divorce for Your Children's Sake
Divorce may sometimes feel necessary, but it has almost entirely negative and lifelong effects on children.
If you have children, your decision to divorce has to be chiefly about what's good for your family. Feelings can be revived and conflict can be healed, but the damage you would do to your children by divorcing is irreversible and may last for generations.
Before you make the final decision to end your marriage, make sure you take into account the following findings from studies at the Pennsylvania State University College of Medicine and the National Bureau of Economic Research.
- Less than 10% of children have adequate support to help them through a divorce.
- Preschool children often demonstrate regression—that is, they backslide in their development. Separation anxiety, sleep problems, and nightmares are common.
- Children grieve for the absent parent in exactly the same ways they would if that parent had died.
- Children are neurologically unable to understand the concept that the divorce is permanent, and often dream that one day their family will be whole again.
- Adolescents often respond with depression, suicidal thoughts, and acting out violently.
- Young adults often find themselves struggling anew with anger, fear, anxiety, guilt and insecurity as they prepare to make their own life decisions. Many are afraid they will be as unsuccessful as their parents at keeping a relationship together.
- Family incomes drop by about 40% after a divorce.
- Food consumption falls by 17%.
- Many children are faced with the task of holding their custodial parent together emotionally.
These are just some of the effects that divorce has on children. If you and your spouse are considering divorcing, make sure you've truly done everything possible to keep your family intact, for your children's sake.