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Category: Abuse in Relationships

Adopted Adults May Unconsciously Seek Out Partners Who Will Abandon Them

Many adults wind up in relationships with partners who may be predisposed to abandon them, according to a new article. Stephen J. Betchen, a clinical marital and family therapist, explains why this happens and what couples can do to address this difficult issue.  Betchen says that many adults end up in therapy because they choose mates who will leave them. He adds “But if adult adoptees can come to the realization that they may have a tendency to replicate the adoption process of being “given away,” they might be better able to avoid choosing a partner that will someday leave …(See More)

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When the Going Gets Tough, Hang in There

The beginning stages of a relationship are thrilling and flawless. But before long, the rose colored glasses have started to fade and things don’t look so rosy anymore. When couples begin to face conflicts, they often believe it is easier to leave the relationship than to do the hard work of sticking it out. But in a recent article, Margaret Paul, Ph.D., a relationship expert, explains why this is not always the best option. She says, “The people I work with often believe that it would be easier to start over with someone else, or easier to be alone. I …(See More)

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Relationship Violence Linked to Bullying in Childhood

With bullying becoming a national epidemic, researchers are questioning the long-term effects of this behavior in those who bully. Kathryn L. Falb, M.H.S., of the Harvard School of Public Health in Boston, conducted a study to determine the relationship between intimate partner violence in adulthood and bullying in childhood. She notes that nearly one in four women will become victims of violence at the hands of their partners at some point in their life. And almost half of the male population has perpetrated violence against a partner. The authors say, “Recent evidence strongly indicates that bullying peers in school may …(See More)

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“Tell Somebody” Campaign Launched to Prevent Domestic Abuse

In the United States, four women per day are killed by a spouse or partner. Domestic violence is often an unspoken reality. In a recent article, Glamour Magazine announced the launch of their “Tell Somebody” Campaign. In an effort to stop domestic violence, the magazine is initiating a campaign that will attempt to reach both survivors of abuse, and their friends and families. Many times people who are suffering abuse in their relationship will not admit the abuse. Therefore, it is often the people closest to the survivors who must speak out on their behalf. The campaign is designed to …(See More)

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Are You Subconsciously Sabotaging Your Relationship?

Dr. Lisa Firestone, a relationship expert, believes that many people push their partners away due to their own insecurities developed from previous life experiences. In a recent article, she said, “If we grew up being treated as incompetent, it’s very likely that we will seek out a partner who perceives us as incompetent.”  These programmed behavior patterns draw us to the wrong type of people then force us to do things to make them leave. “People who fear rejection find ways to push their partners away.” said Dr. Firestone. She encourages people to begin to know their own voids and …(See More)

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Male Abuse Survivors May be at Higher Risk for PSTD

Male survivors of domestic abuse may be at a higher risk for post-traumatic stress disorder, depression and thoughts of suicide. A new article reveals that both physical and psychological abuse of men often go unreported, leading to mental distress. “Given the stigma surrounding this issue and the increased vulnerability of men in these abusive relationships, we as mental health experts should not ignore the need for more services for these men,” said British researcher Anna Randle, Psy.D., lead author of a paper in the journal Psychology of Men & Masculinity. Copyright 2011 Marriage-Counseling-Guide.com

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Controlling Partners Prone to Other Abusive Behavior

New research shows that a high number of women who are in controlling relationships also experience physical or sexual abuse by their partner. “In addition, this awareness of the high rates of controlling behavior and the overlap with relationship violence, particularly for young people, may affect how they view health care provider-based screening and how honestly they might answer screening questions.” said Marina Catallozzi, M.D., of the Mailman School of Public Health, Columbia University, and colleagues who conducted the study. “An awareness that young women may not be comfortable disclosing information honestly should prompt carefully crafted, repeated, and novel screening …(See More)

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Causes of Marital Jealousy and Protectiveness

What causes one spouse to exhibit extreme jealousy when the other talks to anyone of the opposite sex? A qualified marriage therapist won’t deliver a blanket reason for this behavior, as it can have a number of causes. Often, jealousy is about fear and doubt: fear that the partner is with you out of obligation rather than love. (This especially common if the marriage is the result of parental prodding rather than a mutual decision to tie the not.) In some cases, jealousy comes from a deep desire to be needed and praised, which has more to do with the …(See More)

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Women’s Perceptions of Abusive Partners Useful for Identification, Research

The issue of abuse –whether psychological, physical, or mental– within marriages and other relationships is the subject of study and inquiry for many psychology professionals and marriage counselors, and finding information about men who commit such abuse is sometimes beleaguered by difficult gathering processes and questionable data quality. Recently, a study conducted both in Toronto and in New York has focused on obtaining data about abusive men from their female partners who are not seeking social services or support. Using a survey of over six hundred women, the researchers found that among women who were abused, many reported finding admirable …(See More)

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Counseling Techniques for Violent Couples Hoping to Heal

Domestic violence is a serious and chronic issue in a large number of marriages and romantic relationships, and holds the potential to affect the lives of everyone within a household. Often, when domestic violence arises as a concern for a given couple, goals created by professionals include apprehending the offender and providing care for the victim, though treatment for both parties –especially as a unit– can be difficult to find. Some professionals are hoping to change this, however, with treatment specifically geared towards couples hoping to recover from domestic violencewith their relationship intact. Through combining marriage counseling along with a …(See More)

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